Life 01 (May 08 - Oct 08)

[winston]

"Who can I make smile right now?" by Mike Brescia

A couple days ago, I called my wife at work. One of her co-workers answered the phone. Now, I like to clown around...a lot.

Do you remember those guys who did the Budweiser commercials that asked each other, "Wazzuuup?" Well, remember the other Bud commercial with the "uncool" guys who ask, "What are you doing?" in the nerdiest way possible?

Well, the woman who picked up the phone, I've only met once for about 5 minutes. After she said hello, I didn't identify myself at all. I just said, "What are you DOING?!" in the uncool way. She said, "Who is this?". Again I asked, "What are YOU doing?!"

All I heard was hysterical laughing and another woman in the background saying, "Is that Mike?"

Later, my wife told me that my "victim" was talking about it throughout the day... about how funny it was.

Now, I know it was only silliness, even mindless. But don't we all need a little of that in our days? Oh, a lot?
I'm for that.

I remember in my book store, if a customer asked for a specific book, and if I was close enough to it, I would do a little soft shoe (with fake top hat and cane) over to the shelf it was on, grab it and dance back over to the customer, presenting it to them with a bow.

That used to floor people!

I had the biggest business of its kind in the world at the time. And I think that giving people a little humor and entertainment was part of it.

Hey, like it or not, we are all 'state' inducers.

Whenever we have an interaction with someone, even if it's just a hello, we leave them with a definite feeling.

What do you think people feel about us when we're walking around with a sour puss on?

No one wants to be around that.

Do you?

Do you go out and search for the complainers? If you do, notice the topic of your typical conversations. Are they usually centered on what's wrong, who said what rotten thing, what someone had the gall to ask you to do? In short, whining sessions?

Look, you are what you think. You get back what you put out. If you put out cheerfulness, then that's how people will treat you back.

Did you ever hear the centuries-old story about the old man who sat next to the road and greeted people who entered and exited just outside his small village?

When travelers came in, often they would ask what kind of people were in the town. The man responded by asking them
what the people were like in the town they just left. If the traveler said the people were terrific, the man told them that he'd find the people in this town were much the same.

If the traveler said the other town had horrible people in it, the man said that they'd find the people here much the same.

It kind of goes right along with another Your Day To Win that talked about running from your problems. The thing is, you bring yourself with you wherever you go. And since you are what you think, the only way for you to escape your problems is to change your attitudes.

If you understand that you induce states of mind in the people that you meet all day, it brings it right to the front of your consciousness, doesn't it? People respond to you whether you like it or not.

To my way of thinking, it's better to bring a smile than a frown or pity or disdain. Better than nothing either. What the heck! It doesn't cost anything at all.

Just one person a day that you make smile will do something amazing for them and...

...inside of you.

Try this easy exercise. I think you'll find it shocking.

Smile for 60 seconds straight. Just sit there and smile. Don't do anything else. Take the next minute. C'mon, you
have another minute! Just sit and smile for one minute.

I'll wait...

Isn't it amazing?!

Don't you immediately sense an actual physical feeling inside you the very second you start to smile? You did, huh? Another thing you'll notice is, you can't do this exercise without getting all kinds of great pictures in your head, remembering fun times, etc.

The physiology of this is quite extraordinary. It's wired into us. When we smile, we are literally programmed to feel good.

If you thought that you had to first feel great to smile, you couldn't be more mistaken. Smile first and you'll feel great.

It's impossible to feel down when we are smiling. If you're still doubting it, try it. Just try to get into a rotten mood with a big dumb silly grin on your face.

You literally can't do it.

Now imagine what you'll be doing for other people if you make it your mission to make at least one person smile per day. The feelings that you're feeling right now as you're sitting there grinning is exactly what you'll be doing for everyone that you make smile...

It's kind of nice to think that you can do that for people any time you want, isn't it?

And another question... what will those people think of you?

If you're up to the assignment, go make 'em smile!

Do it everyday and your life will change.

[winston]

Step Out by Bob Tschannen-Moran

Perhaps you saw this title coming. Last week I encouraged you to step back from the crises and turmoil of modern life through shifting perspective, seeking connection, and studying meditation. Given all the recent uproar and talk of an impending financial meltdown, I hope you took the time to try some of those practices. That's especially true because of what stepping back can generate, namely, the ability to see alternatives, to question assumptions, to challenge attributions, and to take actions.

Simply put: we step back in order to step out with new insights, energies, and directions. That is how stepping back and stepping out are related. When we take the time to gather our wits, becoming clear about the stories we are hearing and telling about the worlds in which we live, we can move beyond the vicissitudes of life to the calm center from which transformational actions can be taken.

That is at least one interpretation of Robert Frost's famous poem, first published in 1916, "The Road Not Taken":
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I —
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

You can listen to Frost reading the poem himself by going to http://www.poets.org/viewmedia.php/prmMID/15717.

Now while there is speculation as to whether this poem was written as an ode to individual expression or as a satire on the importance we give to our choices (imagine the sigh and the final word being said with a crooked smile), no one disputes that life is filled with choices made and roads not taken. Whatever their consequence, those choices and roads both reflect and impact our way in the world. In the grand scheme of things they may or may not make all that much difference, but they do make a difference to the choosers and the travelers. They do make a difference to us.

Stepping back enables us to choose and travel well, whether we take one road or the other. I like the image of Frost standing for a long time, looking down each road, before deciding his path. I also like the notion of using "the road less traveled by" as a criterion for making one's choice. Stepping back is more than just catching our breath. It's getting clear about what would meet our needs, in this moment, and then stepping out accordingly.

There are literally countless strategies to meet our needs, but people often get attached to one strategy or another without fleshing out their feelings or fully considering their options. They don't take the time to look far down the roads of two or more ways, exploring their feelings about each, before proceeding. When that happens, people bear down rather than step out. They insist on their way as the way as if heaven and earth were riding on their one approach.

That's what I like about the ironic, rather than the literal, translation of Frost's poem. Do our choices really make all that much difference? Viewed with the hindsight of old age, our choices may not seem to make all that much difference after all. One way or the other may have been "just as fair," as with the destinations they lead to, so let's not get over anxious about choosing the right way.

Instead, let's step out into what Ben and Roz Zander call the zone of possibility. Try every road that would seem to be more fair. Then look out for the difference it can make.

[kennynah]

"there was a fork in a wood, and I,
I took the road less travelled by,
and it made all the difference" - some great writer

[winston]

SPIRITUAL GROWTH -- Soulful Living - By Natasha Dern

As we progress on the spiritual path, periodic withdrawal from the world, in time, becomes a necessity. The occasional retreat from the world will benefit us; we will come out stronger and clearer. If we desire to find the highest within ourselves we must separate ourselves from the clamorous atmosphere of the world, in search of the quieter places within.

Most often our inner voice will speak to us in absolute quietness. When we cultivate time for silence we begin to learn the art of being still, the art of being alone, and the art of communion with the Divine. This discipline will help balance us and ground us.

When we are engaged in endless activities, whether work or social, without solitude and inner withdrawal we become unbalanced, tense, and disoriented. We need to retreat occasionally to cleanse ourselves inwardly, to conserve our energies, to examine ourselves and to practice the art of deep reflection.

It is not suggested that we should neglect our outer life for the inner one, but we must turn our attention inward on a regular basis if we wish to live peacefully.

[winston]

ANXIETY -- Forget Worries Before Sleeping - By Jess Ba-ad

Modern day life imposes so much stress on us that the fears, anxieties, worries, and problems occupy our minds til we go to sleep. Millions of sleeping pills are prescribed every year and millions more are added each year. It would be safe to assume that our modern and advancing lifestyles enforce stress in our lives.

Bills to pay, project deadlines, end of a relationship, insecurity, and debts are just a few of the factors that could trigger emotional and psychological stress.

Physical stress also rise in modern day living. Pollution, unhealthy eating habits, and too much activity can also put excessive stress in our bodies. Physical stress coupled with psychological stress can make us weaker and more defenseless when viruses or bacteria attack our bodies.

[winston]

Journaling to Self-Discovery By Carol Adler, MFA

Journaling is one of the most creative ways to heal a fragmented self. Regardless of the identified condition: Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Co-dependency, Grief, Depression, Substance Abuse or some other type of addictive habit or behavior; keeping a journal and making regular entries can often be the first step toward reconciliation of these disparate selves.

One could say that any type of creative expression—painting, writing, sculpting, dancing, acting, composing and performing music--is a form of therapy because it transports us to another world; in the process releasing unwanted stress. Creative activities such as journaling also give us a chance to visit intimately with ourselves.

Details of daily living are basic to our health and well-being; we all know what it’s like when we get too far behind in paying the bills or doing the laundry. By the same token, it’s easy to get so caught up in the list of ToDo’s that we forget to take time for ourselves.

From the mundane to the sublime

The process of journaling can be magical. As a writer, I always feel the energy shift as soon as I sit down at my computer or curl up with a pad and pen in my favorite easy chair. Now I know it’s “The Big I” that’s on center stage and I get a chance to star in my own show. That’s what journaling is all about.

Establish a special time and place for journaling. At first that time may be only five or ten minutes and then as you gather enthusiasm and momentum, lengthen it another five minutes, then another five... and so on.

Let your journaling experience be a “breath of fresh air” that you can look forward to. Give this time your best energy. Be rested and alert. Also, make sure you choose a place where you can write without being interrupted.

When you’re journaling, ignore details of grammar, usage and punctuation and “let it flow.” Focus on being excited about the process of staying intimate and creative with yourself.

Journaling helps us dream again

Having the courage to “look in the mirror” and then go to the source of the pain or discomfort can be the first step toward self-discovery. In subsequent journal entries as we tell our story to ourselves, we may find the answers to issues that have been troubling us for many years.

In the privacy of our journal, we can start to be honest with ourselves and shed some of the denial that may have been holding us captive to unwanted beliefs, feelings and habits.

Energy medicine or total body healing is about freeing blockages. The more releasing we do, the freer we become. The freer we become, the easier it is to align with our wishes and dreams. Journaling can build enthusiasm about this new life we are manifesting.

Some of the most valuable book manuscripts that are submitted to Dandelion Books, my publishing company, are from individuals healing from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder who have decided to write down their story. Often these are fictionalized autobiographical accounts of war experiences, or stories about getting involved with street gangs and drug dealing.

In both scenarios, alcohol, drugs, sex and other addictive habits mask the pain of shame, self-blame, low self-esteem and feelings of helplessness. Things are so bad, there’s no turning back.

Then “the shift happens.” Although no one can explain the dynamics of self-transformation, none of us can deny the experience when it occurs. That’s when journaling can take on a whole new dimension. What happened? Why? How did WE participate in this experience?

We do know that if we create our reality, it’s possible that we invited the challenges in order to grow from them—and tell our story. For this we can only offer our gratitude.

Encourage your clients to journal; try journaling yourself. You don’t have to be challenged by a serious mental or physical condition to experience the positive benefits. We are all works in progress; doing the inner work is an ongoing growth process, and one of the best tools for doing that work is self-expression.

[winston]

Making Friends In Unlikely Places By Judith Matloff

The first person I met when we bought our "fixer upper" brownstone in Harlem eight years ago was a manic crack addict named Salami. This menacing apparition bolted out of the abandoned house next door to inform me that he planned to take over our new abode.

"It ain't your house, Mama," he hollered about the property in which I had just sunk all our savings. "I used to squat there and I'm gonna get it back."

Thus began my adventure in what is euphemistically called an "emerging neighborhood." My husband and I bought our decayed Victorian townhouse because it was cheap. We didn't have a lot of money and having lived in dodgy places abroad, we thought it was worth taking a risk on this sketchy neighborhood. What we learned along the way is that a house doesn't stop at four walls and it's worth negotiating with unfriendly neighbors. Even folks like Salami can be won over.

Not that he was our only problem. The street, we only learned right after taking possession of the house, lay in the epicenter of the narcotics trade of the northeastern seaboard. Funny -- the real estate agent neglected to tell us this. On a given day 20 vigorous Dominican youths leaned on our front gate and hawked cocaine to armed men in big cars. This drug Wall Street made it hard to find parking -- clients took all the spaces -- and the dealers used our front steps as a garbage can and toilet.

My cousin Greg, who had purchased a similarly abandoned house elsewhere in New York City, advised me to reason with the fellows. "Tell them that you won't call the cops if they promise not to piss on your property," he advised. Following his lead, I went up to the head of the gang, a suave fellow draped in gold chains, and used my fluent Spanish to strike a deal. Just as Greg said, these narcotics peddlers weren’t that bad -- just young men trying to make a buck to send back home.

The last thing they wanted was for us to interrupt business. The guys not only agreed to stay off our front steps, but after a while even held a parking spot for my elderly mother when she came to visit. They also chased away a stoned trespasser who threatened to stab my pregnant belly.

Despite his initial hostility, Salami was surprisingly easy to win over, too. It took me some time to gather up the nerve to approach him. Salami had muscles like a bodybuilder, which he pumped up by swinging on the traffic lights. He also had an unnerving tendency to shriek uncontrollably when high. I broke the ice with some questions about his gunshot wounds -- he wore them proudly like tattoos -- and further sealed cordiality by offering him odd jobs like sweeping up construction debris.

There were a couple setbacks, like the time he sabotaged our attempt to rent out the basement. (Salami parked himself at the front gate in a swivel chair and introduced himself to would-be lodgers as the local "crackologist." Naturally, no one wanted to sign a lease.) Eventually, Salami accepted our claims on the house and we found tenants who weren't intimidated by his act. I wouldn't say that we became close friends, but Salami drops by periodically to sweep up broken glass outside the house and helps me carry groceries up the front steps. When my book about the neighborhood, "Home Girl," came out he demanded a signed copy.

We had similar luck with another crack addict who loved books. He couldn't get a library card because he was homeless, so we lent him reading matter -- he particularly liked detective novels -- in return for protection. In exchange, this ex-con looked after our car to make sure no one stole the hubcaps. Once I left the keys in the front door of the house and he sat on the on the steps for several hours until I got home to make sure no one broke in. Now that's a good neighbor!

Naturally, we simultaneously built alliances with law-abiding residents. These included the elderly black folks who had lived on the block for a quarter of a century. We made sure to have them over for barbecues, and my husband offered to shovel their sidewalks when it snowed. In the process, we grew to appreciate the village flavor.

People who don't have a lot of money often stick closely together and the pavement here resembles an extension of their tiny apartments. Kids play on the street because they can't afford after-school piano lessons. That means people actually know each other, a delicious rarity in New York City. When I was on pregnancy bed rest the neighbors would drop by to ensure I had enough to eat. The street matriarch maintained such a close eye through her back window that she'd phone and order me to get back to bed if she saw me slinking into the kitchen.

Aside from the chumminess, there's a lot to be said for a working class neighborhood where tacos and babysitters cost less than in nicer parts of town. We save a lot of money by going to parks instead of enrolling in gyms. The local coffee costs less than a dollar and tastes better than Starbucks. Oh, and did I mention the baseball Little League? The local Dominican teams cost a fraction of the downtown white ones, and my kid is perfecting his Spanish in the bargain.

The foreclosure crisis has sent a lot of affordable property on the market and people are always asking for advice on navigating what used to be called "slums." Without a doubt, we got lucky with our particular set-up. Our rougher characters are a tame bunch compared to, say, the drug crew that terrorized a nearby building. Those thugs were so mean that residents were scared to leave their apartments. The brutes harassed women and openly brandished weapons in the halls. In contrast, Salami is a bunny rabbit. During a recent frank discussion about first impressions, he was astounded that I once feared he might stab me. "Whaddya crazy, Mama?" he blinked. He then confided that he first thought I was a stuck-up racist. "I've decided you're okay, after all," Salami conceded.

The moral of this tale, I guess, is to keep an open mind and not be scared off by first appearances. Negotiation goes a long way. Most people, when you get down to it, simply want a bit of respect.

[winston]

Unspeakable Actions, Unspeakable Consequences By Robert Ringer

The media had a field day stripping John Edwards of his "two-Americas" robe, but I'd rather focus on the Greek tragedy Edwards now finds himself starring in. There are a number of insights we can derive from it... especially when we examine the plight of Edwards's wife, Elizabeth.

I can relate to Mrs. Edwards's situation, because it reminds me of the last years of my sister's life. After about 40 years of marriage, through most of which she endured subtle verbal abuse, my sister discovered that her husband had been cheating on her for quite some time. After considerable emotional turmoil and an attempt at reconciliation, she finally filed for, and obtained, a divorce.

A couple of years later, my sister's oldest son died in a horrific automobile accident. It was a devastating blow, one from which she never fully recovered.

Then, about eight years after her son's death, her doctor handed over her own death sentence in the form of a diagnosis of terminal lung cancer. Sadly, she had been a three-to-four-pack-a-day smoker since she was a teenager. The news stunned our family... and, unfortunately, her end came slowly and painfully.

Because of the difference in our ages - and the fact that we lived 2,500 miles apart - my sister and I had never been particularly close. But when one of her children called to tell me the end was near, I dropped everything and flew to California to see her. If you've ever had a relative or good friend die of cancer, you know it's a pretty grim experience.

I'm thankful I was able to see my sister before she died, because it gave me the opportunity to tell her, in person, that I loved her. Although she had been drifting in and out of consciousness, she opened her eyes, turned her head slowly toward me, and, as I held her hand in mine, said with a faint smile, "Really?" She seemed genuinely pleased by my words. I will always feel good about that.

I sat by her side for about two hours, though she no longer seemed to be aware that I was present. When the time came for me to leave for the airport, I kissed her on the forehead, said goodbye, and walked toward the bedroom door.

When I reached the door, I turned and looked back at her, realizing that I would never see her again. And I remember wondering to myself what the purpose of her life had been. She had barely made a ripple while she was here... then suffered triple painful blows during her remaining years. I could hear that old Peggy Lee song - "Is that all there is?" - in my head.

In her youth, my sister was very pretty, very bright (graduating second in her high school class), and extremely popular with both girls and guys. But before she could even make it to college, she married Prince Charming. She could never have imagined what was in store for her.

On the plane ride home, I thought about how sad the last years of my sister's life had been: a bitter divorce... her brilliant, loving son dead in an instant in a cataclysmic clash of steel and glass... her own slow, painful death. The suffering she endured during those 10 years is still unfathomable to me.

Though I know very little about Elizabeth Edwards as a person, I thought about my sister when I first heard that her breast cancer had returned. She not only is the same age as my sister was when she passed away, she, too, lost a young son in an automobile accident.

Though I have always had a low regard for John Edwards (as I do for anyone who arrogantly anoints himself as the savior of "the poor"), I felt genuine empathy for both him and his wife as a result of the two terrible blows they had endured in such a short period of time. But who could have imagined that a third, and, in many ways, even worse, blow was yet to come?

When a husband tells his wife he's been having an affair, it's painful for both parties. But rational people recognize that, to one extent or another, we're all "sinners"... we all make mistakes. Put another way, even good people sometimes do bad things.

But when you throw in the fact that a man's wife has incurable cancer, it takes a person of incredible goodwill to be able to write off that man's affair as just a "mistake." Now, it appears that even after Edwards admitted his indiscretion, he was still carrying on the affair... while his wife was bearing the burden of coming to grips with her mortality.

I don't even want to think about the possibility that the National Enquirer is right about Edwards's plans to marry his mistress after his wife dies. That would be a dark side to this story that only a saint could forgive.

No human being should have to endure the succession of blows Elizabeth Edwards has taken... and, I fear, may have to suffer as additional facts are brought to light about her husband's indiscretions (plural).

No matter what issues or sadness you are dealing with in your own life, unless you can match Elizabeth Edwards's hand card for card, it would be a good idea to make an effort to be grateful for what you have - and what you don't have.

With few exceptions, no matter how heavy our burdens may be, there are millions of people around the globe who are much worse off than we are. As Socrates put it: "If all our misfortunes were laid in one common heap whence everyone must take an equal portion, most people would be contented to take their own."

One last thought: A good definition of a near-divine human being might be "someone who always takes into consideration how his words and actions might affect those he loves - then speaks and acts accordingly." Something we mortals might do well to aspire to.

[winston]

Love, Fear & Money by Dan Liss

I have not always handled my money wisely. Like some of you, I made some investments that bottomed out. Divorces diminish a person's net worth. And yes, I could have also set more aside, but chose to spend it instead. So I work a full time day job plus work at developing my own business evenings and weekends, which I enjoy tremendously. I have always figured that I would stay busy until I die, and it would be great if I had enough money so that I might have a comfortable cushion between my necessary expenses and occasional luxuries. Many of us are in the same position, aren't we?

Feeding off our fears of lack of money, there are predators who see us as targets for a renewed recent wave of get-rich-quick seminars. We know that people can make money in the stock market, real estate investing and other methods. And we also know that if we are not impeccable with our execution in these efforts, we can lose whatever we have invested.

For example, it is still possible to make money in the stock market, but you must buy and sell at very quick intervals and use excellent judgment on when to by and sell. You can also make money flipping houses, but you have to be prepared to do most of the labor yourself or be prepared to hold it for quite a while until it resells, perhaps becoming a rental landlord. If you have deep pockets, this is not a problem, but if you only have a modest amount of money to invest, any of these factors can wipe you out in short time.

We get mailers all the time from people sponsoring seminars that offer guest speakers and maybe even a free lunch. Usually these have some ridiculous bogus price attached to them like “$160 value” or "$250 value" but no one ever pays that because these tickets are complimentary if you respond and make a reservation, providing them your name, address, phone and email so that they can continue to send you more sucker bait forever. The real thing is that the free talks may give you a few tidbits of information or some inspiration, but then the rest of the talk is peppered with sales pitches for their “intensive three day seminar” which may only cost $495 if you buy today.Or maybe only $5,000 if you buy today.

One all day series of free seminars in “wealth building” we attended featured a speaker who offered a $100 kit that would help a person figure out how to make money on eBay. This struck me as odd, given that millions of people have already figured out how to use eBay without a kit. Another speaker offered a special three-day training in how to make money in real estate, for only $6,000 with additional “mentoring by phone” available for several thousand more. And this is from a person I never heard of anywhere but in this seminar. Another speaker offered a kit that included the addresses of county assessors offices. Another offered software that would tell you when to buy and sell stocks. And, of course, all these prices were “show specials.” When we calculated up the offers from one of these days, if you would have purchased everything that was offered, you would have spent $10,000 in one day just on kits and workshops.

The attitude of some of the seminar leaders was downright snarky. For example, in response to one person, the leader shot back, “Did you make a million during the dot com boom in the 90s? Why not? This is one of the top markets in the country in foreclosures. Have you made a million in foreclosures yet? Why not?” The implication being that you must either be stupid or lazy if you didn’t.

I mean what else could it be? We have not yet arrived at a point where you can go to a realtor's office, swipe a credit card, and walk out with a deed.

But no, I was wrong about that. The whole idea was about making space available on our cards so that the next day we could get all excited and put some dandy purchases on our newly enlarged credit limits. Just imagine that you are offered the opportunity to sign up for a workshop costing $77,863. However, if you signed up right then at the three-day seminar the price was reduced to only $43,990. The least expensive one was $12,975, but only $8,990 if you sign up right now. Look how much you are saving if you sign up today! It never occurred to me for one minute to actually buy any of this. I thought to myself that if I could put $77,000 into property and get started flipping I would have an actual asset.

Then the sleazebag told us that he would pray for us to make the right decision. We decided that returning for the third day of the seminar would be just too disgusting. As it was I felt like I needed to get home and take a shower.

Some of the courses offer information already generally available to the public. If you want to find out about properties with delinquent taxes, the county assessor’s office is the place to find out. You can find any county assessor's office address and phone simply by looking online. If you need an attorney to help you incorporate, or an accountant to help you make financial decisions, you can look them up very easily too. Want to find houses or commercial properties that are bargain priced? Try driving around and looking at buildings with For Sale signs in front of them and either pick up the free flyers or call the number on the sign. Or take a tour of the many websites showcasing real estate for sale.

Watch a few episodes of the TV show, Flip This House and others like it.Yes, a person can make money investing in real estate. It takes some research, planning and perhaps some physical labor. Most people who have made money this way figured it out without spending tens of thousands to attend workshops. Use your tens of thousands to actually invest.

Some people think that these things are worth attending because you get some bits of wisdom and inspiration from them even without buying the bigger packages. Some of the speakers were good, entertaining speakers, but none of them was worth a whole day of my time. This is the price we pay for our education sometimes.

The popularity of these workshops is all based on the fear factor. Nobody wants to look forward to a miserable life where you may become homeless or eat dog food in order to survive, and these speakers will stoop lower than low to try and separate you from your wallet.

But by using your own common sense, books that are readily available in bookstores and libraries, information on the Internet, some creative thinking and looking for opportunities, a person could increase their income without forking over tens of thousands of dollars to the hustlers and shills coming to your town with the most recent wealth building seminar. These carnivals are the modern day freak shows featuring speakers promising that you can get rich quick are somewhat entertaining and do offer a few bits of information. But if you sign up for everything they offer, the only one guaranteed to get rich off these seminars are the people sponsoring them.

As we actually examined some of what was being taught, there were some good ideas, but they were mixed in with some of questionable legality and some that were just plain jaw dropping. What comes to mind was one talk where the speaker laid out a plan to make money leasing properties. The thing is, if you simply pulled out your little calculator and did the numbers, it would be a great deal for the person selling it, but would never add up to a good deal for the person buying it.

I am a capitalist, and I am motivated by love. A person can make money by being ethical and honest, working hard, making smart investments and looking for good deals. There will always be opportunities. We just have to decide when and how to go about them and which opportunities to take and which ones to leave. There still is no free lunch and any deal that sounds too good to be true probably is.

Above all, there is this metaphysical axiom: All things come from either love or fear. Choose love.

[kennynah]