Smile & Laugh 03 (Apr 09 - Oct 09)

[millionairemind]

http://www.talkingcock.com/html/article.php?sid=2618


Dear Prime Minister,

We citizens of Singapore urge you to PLEASE MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS.

We DO NOT NEED your help. Every time, you mention HELP, we have to run for cover!!!

Help the poor? Raise GST!

Help traffic flow? Up ERP!

Help passenger service? Up Bus fare/MRT fare!

Help us get taxi? Raise taxi fare!

Help us get good government? Raise Minister and Civil servants' salary!

Everytime YOU WANT TO HELP, we all PAY FOR IT!!!

THANK YOU THANK YOU...TOLONG LAH, please, we will HELP OURSELVES, no need your help liao.

We DARE NOT ask for help any more!!!

Sir, most honoured sir, I urge you NOT TO HELP Singapore INVEST also!

Everytime your wife invest, we all lose money! Kao liao, kam siah!

Just let us have a dose of bad governance, like recently the Mat Alamak case, like dat....so far, it is ok, your incompetence, we ACCEPT!

PLEASE DO NOT help us have better security! Wait we all kena PAY FOR
IT!!

I believe ALL SINGAPOREANS PREFER NOT TO HAVE CRUTCH MENTALITY!

I think it is ok lah, please just take your salary and enjoy life ok?

Thank you thank you,

I am very chin chai one, any how any how, no need to help oso can one.

--A Citizen

[millionairemind]

everything men know about women


The following is a comprehensive federal study, approved by the Attorney General:
Everything Men Know About Women

















End of Report
U.S. Attorney General's Office

[millionairemind]

Needs
Husband and wife are getting all snugly in bed. The passion is heating up.

But then the wife stops and says, "I don' t feel like it. I just want you to hold me."

The husband says " WHAT???" The wife explains that he must not be in tune with her emotional needs as a woman.

The husband realizes that nothing is going to happen tonight and he might as well deal with it.

So the next day the husband takes her shopping at a big dept. store. He walks around and had her try on three very expensive outfits. And then tells his wife, We 'll take all three of them. Then goes over and gets matching shoes worth $200 each.

And then goes to the jewelry Dept. and gets a set of diamond earrings. The wife is so excited (she thinks her husband has flipped out, but she does not care). She goes for the tennis bracelet.

The husband says "but you don 't even play tennis, but OK if you like it then lets get it.'

The wife is jumping up and down. So excited she cannot even believe what is going on. She says " I am ready to go, lets go to the cash register. "

The husband says, " no no no, honey we're not going to buy all this stuff." The wife face goes blank.

" No honey - I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while."

Her face gets really red she is about to explode and then the husband says " You must not be in tune with my financial needs as a MAN!"

[sidney]

Hahahaha good idea. Next time i can use this to draw up counter offense. whumhahahaaa

[Cherry]

How to have your cake and eat it

It is raining, and the little town looks totally deserted. It is tough times, everybody is in debt, and everybody lives on credit.

Suddenly, a rich tourist comes to town.

He enters the only hotel, lays a $100 note on the reception counter, and goes to inspect the rooms upstairs in order to pick one.

The hotel proprietor takes the $100 and runs to pay his debt to the butcher.
The Butcher takes the $100 , and runs to pay his debt to the pig grower.

The pig grower takes the $100 , and runs to pay his debt to the supplier of his feed and fuel.

The supplier of feed and fuel takes the $100 and runs to pay his debt to the town’s prostitute that, in these hard times, gave her “services” on credit.

The hooker runs to the hotel, and pays off her debt with the $100 to the hotel proprietor to pay for the rooms that she rented when she brought her clients there.

The hotel proprietor then lays the $100 back on the counter so that the rich tourist will not suspect anything.

At that moment, the rich tourist comes down after inspecting the rooms, and takes his $100 , after saying that he did not like any of the rooms, and leaves town.

No one earned anything. However, the whole town is now without debt, and looks to the future with a lot of optimism.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how the United States Government is doing business today.

Question : Who is the winner and who is the loser?

[kennynah]

when the US govt stops funding space missions....

[kennynah]

there's now MS Windows 7.....

this is what migration to the latest OS from your existing XP/Vista really means...

[kennynah]

and this is what Bill has to say to earth.....

[kennynah]

Warning.... , seeing this image can cause serious headache....

Hidden Content:

see into her eyes...if you can

[kennynah]

it's a sunday....so....relax...