8 Speechmaking "Rules" You Should NOT Pay Attention To By Michael Masterson
I found the following "rules" in a popular book on speechmaking. It occurred to me that they are all wrong.
1. Don't be nervous. What good does this advice do? Telling someone not to be nervous is like telling someone not to flinch when you slap him.
2. Use a podium. This is a big mistake. Using a podium will only make your presentation appear static and boring.
3. State your objective by telling them what you're going to tell them. You need to tell them what you are going to tell them, yes. But that's not your objective. Your objective is to give them information that they need. So tell them how your speech will help, instruct, or enlighten them. Make it clear that they will benefit from what you have to say.
4. Speak slowly. What matters in speech is articulation, not speed. Pace your speech with your enthusiasm. Pronounce each word. Be natural.
5. Tell a joke to get started. Too risky. If you feel you need to tell a joke to loosen yourself up, chances are you won't tell it well. It's safer and just as effective to lead with a strong, compelling statement or question.
6. Cover all bases. I've never been able to cover even half the bases. If you research your subject properly, if you do some serious thinking, if you prepare yourself by seeking ideas and talking to other people, you'll have much, much more to say than you will be able to say in the time allotted. Decide, beforehand, on the most important issues and address them. Leave the lesser matters to the Q&A period, if there is one.
7. Summarize at the end. Never summarize. Summary is always boring because it is, by definition, abstract or diluted. Rather than summarize, restate your big idea in a different way. Make your last line a knock-out punch.
8. Keep control at all times. Like the "Don't be nervous" advice, this isn't helpful. The way to keep control is not to think about control. Think about what you are saying. Think, "I have something important to tell these people. They really need to hear it." Focus on your ideas, not yourself.
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Success University 02 (Nov 08 - Jan 09)
Re: Success University (Nov 08 - Jan 09)
by winston » Tue Jan 27, 2009 8:55 pm
It's all about "how much you made when you were right" & "how little you lost when you were wrong"
-
winston - Billionaire Boss
- Posts: 119682
- Joined: Wed May 07, 2008 9:28 am
Re: Success University (Nov 08 - Jan 09)
by winston » Wed Jan 28, 2009 8:29 pm
The Secret to Letting Go of Every Fear by Guy Finley
Are you afraid of some condition in your life? Here’s a life-transforming secret: that seemingly scary condition, whatever it may be, is not the problem. It is your reaction that is fearful. This is why if you will become conscious of your condition instead of afraid of it, you will change forever your relationship with fear.
It is only within this special kind of inner-relationship that there is real safety, because now you are interacting with fear in an entirely new way. You are no longer letting it dictate to you how to act or what to do. Instead, you are aware of the fear. You are learning to quietly observe and study it. And, each day, as you discover something new about the strange and shaky nature of your own fearful reactions, they begin to lose their power over you.
Why? Because you are at last seeing them for what they have always been: unintelligent mechanical forces. You are slowly becoming stronger than they are because by seeing them as they are—not as they would have you see them—you have helped yourself to climb above and outside of their influence. This self-insight is the difference between trembling through your life and being in command of it.
To be consciously afraid means that you know you are frightened, but at the same time you know that these very fears, as real as they may seem, are not you. And no wrong reaction can keep you captive once you begin to see it for what it is.
Fear is, and has always been, nothing but a self-limiting reaction that we cling to in the darkness of our present life-level, having mistaken it for a shield of self-protection. But, just as the faintest of early morning sunlight can dispel the night-long darkness, so does the smallest of insights into a persistent fear lead to letting it go.
You can prove this powerful principle to yourself anytime you want. Just dare to proceed even while being afraid. But remember, your new aim isn't to be courageous or to try and act strong in the face of fear. No. We've seen that this won't work. You simply want to be more curious about your frightened thoughts and feelings than you want to believe in them.
If you will follow this simple but higher instruction, not only will you start to see these habitual reactions that have been keeping you scared and running, you'll actually start seeing through them. This is where the real miracle occurs.
Each new insight into the actual nature of these negative reactions removes some of their power over you. And their loss is your gain. You are stronger now and you know it. You also know this new strength will never fail you because it isn't just the temporary appearance of a bold opposite. This new strength of yours is the absence of an old weakness.
Let's look at just one of the ways in which this principle of putting self-illumination before psychological self-protection can turn fear into fearlessness.
Do you know someone who you would rather run from than run into? Most of us do! Nevertheless, starting right now, resolve never again to avoid any person that scares you.
In fact, go ahead and walk right up to that critical man or aggressive woman and say or do exactly what you want instead of letting the fear tell you to do what it wants. Have no ideas at all about the way things should or shouldn't go. You are there to watch and learn about yourself, not to win an ego victory. Let that person see you shake if that is what starts to happen. What do you care? Besides, it is only temporary. That unpleasant person before you can't know it, but you are shaking yourself awake.
For the first time, you are letting your reactions roll by instead of letting them carry you away. As you stand there, momentarily apart from your usual self and working hard to remain as inwardly watchful as you know how, you can see that this flood of previously unconscious reactions has its own life story; a shaky sort of story that up until now you had embraced as your own. But now you are beginning to see the whole story. The fears do not belong to you. Here is the explanation:
You have never been afraid of another person. The only thing you have ever been frightened by is your own thoughts about that person. Yes, you did feel fear, but it wasn't yours and it wasn't towards someone stronger than you. The fear you felt was in what you thought he or she was thinking about you.
Amazing isn't it? You have been afraid of your own thoughts! And seeing this ends this. Now you can let this thought-self go, because no one holds on to terror.
(Excerpted from The Secret of Letting Go, Rev. Edition, Llewellyn, 2007)
Are you afraid of some condition in your life? Here’s a life-transforming secret: that seemingly scary condition, whatever it may be, is not the problem. It is your reaction that is fearful. This is why if you will become conscious of your condition instead of afraid of it, you will change forever your relationship with fear.
It is only within this special kind of inner-relationship that there is real safety, because now you are interacting with fear in an entirely new way. You are no longer letting it dictate to you how to act or what to do. Instead, you are aware of the fear. You are learning to quietly observe and study it. And, each day, as you discover something new about the strange and shaky nature of your own fearful reactions, they begin to lose their power over you.
Why? Because you are at last seeing them for what they have always been: unintelligent mechanical forces. You are slowly becoming stronger than they are because by seeing them as they are—not as they would have you see them—you have helped yourself to climb above and outside of their influence. This self-insight is the difference between trembling through your life and being in command of it.
To be consciously afraid means that you know you are frightened, but at the same time you know that these very fears, as real as they may seem, are not you. And no wrong reaction can keep you captive once you begin to see it for what it is.
Fear is, and has always been, nothing but a self-limiting reaction that we cling to in the darkness of our present life-level, having mistaken it for a shield of self-protection. But, just as the faintest of early morning sunlight can dispel the night-long darkness, so does the smallest of insights into a persistent fear lead to letting it go.
You can prove this powerful principle to yourself anytime you want. Just dare to proceed even while being afraid. But remember, your new aim isn't to be courageous or to try and act strong in the face of fear. No. We've seen that this won't work. You simply want to be more curious about your frightened thoughts and feelings than you want to believe in them.
If you will follow this simple but higher instruction, not only will you start to see these habitual reactions that have been keeping you scared and running, you'll actually start seeing through them. This is where the real miracle occurs.
Each new insight into the actual nature of these negative reactions removes some of their power over you. And their loss is your gain. You are stronger now and you know it. You also know this new strength will never fail you because it isn't just the temporary appearance of a bold opposite. This new strength of yours is the absence of an old weakness.
Let's look at just one of the ways in which this principle of putting self-illumination before psychological self-protection can turn fear into fearlessness.
Do you know someone who you would rather run from than run into? Most of us do! Nevertheless, starting right now, resolve never again to avoid any person that scares you.
In fact, go ahead and walk right up to that critical man or aggressive woman and say or do exactly what you want instead of letting the fear tell you to do what it wants. Have no ideas at all about the way things should or shouldn't go. You are there to watch and learn about yourself, not to win an ego victory. Let that person see you shake if that is what starts to happen. What do you care? Besides, it is only temporary. That unpleasant person before you can't know it, but you are shaking yourself awake.
For the first time, you are letting your reactions roll by instead of letting them carry you away. As you stand there, momentarily apart from your usual self and working hard to remain as inwardly watchful as you know how, you can see that this flood of previously unconscious reactions has its own life story; a shaky sort of story that up until now you had embraced as your own. But now you are beginning to see the whole story. The fears do not belong to you. Here is the explanation:
You have never been afraid of another person. The only thing you have ever been frightened by is your own thoughts about that person. Yes, you did feel fear, but it wasn't yours and it wasn't towards someone stronger than you. The fear you felt was in what you thought he or she was thinking about you.
Amazing isn't it? You have been afraid of your own thoughts! And seeing this ends this. Now you can let this thought-self go, because no one holds on to terror.
(Excerpted from The Secret of Letting Go, Rev. Edition, Llewellyn, 2007)
It's all about "how much you made when you were right" & "how little you lost when you were wrong"
-
winston - Billionaire Boss
- Posts: 119682
- Joined: Wed May 07, 2008 9:28 am
Re: Success University (Nov 08 - Jan 09)
by winston » Thu Jan 29, 2009 9:24 am
Don't Be A Slave To Guilt by Mike Brescia
------------------------------
Today's Empowering Quote
------------------------------
"We cling to our bad feelings and beat ourselves with the past when what we should do is let go of it, like Peter did. Once you let go of guilt, then you go out and change the world." -James Carroll
------------------------------
Today's Empowering Question
------------------------------
"What do I feel guilty about? Why? Isn't it about time I let it go?"
------------------------------
Today's Fast Session
------------------------------
Whew! There are a lot of things to feel guilty about aren't there?
We could feel bad about our thoughts, our mistakes, our failures. We didn't try hard enough. We didn't make a decision soon enough and lost out on something we wanted. We invested too heavily in one company, and its stock bombed.
Something we said or did deeply hurt another person. We told an off-color joke. We were responsible to hundreds or even thousands of others and somehow, we let them down. It's endless.
And we die a thousand deaths over it.
It's true that our thoughts, words and actions can have negative consequences.
Fortunately, it's these consequences, thought out beforehand, that keep us from doing many things that WOULD hurt others as well as ourselves.
But we can't foresee EVERY bad result coming down the pike. To err is human, as they say.
Knowing that, though, doesn't always (and for some people, it never does) make it feel any better when we make a blunder. Soooo, we get the guilt... which can be very useful.
But it's when we get overrun with guilt that we just get paralyzed, unable to forgive ourselves for this "heinous" act we performed.
As James Carroll said, St. Peter was able to forgive himself for denying Jesus and move on to take actions that changed the course of the world in a positive way. If he had forever thought himself horrible and unable to make amends, our world could be very different today.
We're all exactly the same as Peter.
So many people make a mistake or say something in a fit of rage, and forever after define themselves by it.
We say that we ARE stupid, or we ARE a bad person, a lazy person, a selfish person. Guilt literally can put us
behind bars in the sense that it takes away our freedom to choose our future actions.
We too often don't want to risk these mistakes again, so we stay quiet. We don't voice our ideas, in case they wouldn't work out... Because if they didn't work, not only would we feel stupid, but we would feel overly responsible for the consequences.
Yes, guilt and shame can be a vicious circle that can literally shackle our potential.
But because it's invisible, we usually don't see it. We just think we're being wise... that we're protecting
ourselves.
Have you ever wondered how people who are in the spotlight or who have been successful in business deal with their impactful decisions that turn out badly?
Well, the trouble with being well known is that your mistakes and blunders are also well known.
So how do these people treat their gaffs?
They put them in a perspective that minimizes them. And as long as this perspective allows them to learn to not repeat the same mistakes over and over, they can go on and continue to be a top performer in their field... which can benefit themselves and others.
What would happen if a popular actress had a movie flop and decided she was the cause? She may never want to risk that kind of failure again. She may start making incredibly bad career decisions... decisions that could potentially affect the flow of hundreds of millions of dollars.
If you are responsible for someone else's tremendous pain or bad situation, how do you go on and achieve a high degree of success, happiness or wealth without feeling guilty?
You don't. Feel the guilt. And learn from it.
But when you've learned what you need, give the guilt a shape, pop it in a jar, seal it up and throw it away.
Forgive yourself.
All our products are filled with statements about letting go of guilt and past hurts because unless you do, there is no risking, no effort, no accomplishment...
...And in the event that you do accomplish much, without self-forgiveness there is little joy in what you've done. You just feel guilty about it.
There are too many good books on the subject for me to steer you toward any one in particular, but do some study on it. Learn about how guilt is affecting you...
...Because you can be certain of one thing. Guilt is negatively affecting your daily decisions to some degree.
And the extent to which you can lessen it is the exact measure of additional accomplishment and joy you will have in your life.
Many people will NEVER forgive you for your actions. That's why YOU have to.
Right now, think of something great that you experienced in the last ten years that you had absolutely no concept of before you experienced it. Remember what it was like during the experience? Stunning. Exhilarating. You were awe struck.
Well, when you can let go of the things you've done and move on with a clean slate, you will feel something that is possibly ten times greater than what you experienced back then.
------------------------------
Today's Empowering Quote
------------------------------
"We cling to our bad feelings and beat ourselves with the past when what we should do is let go of it, like Peter did. Once you let go of guilt, then you go out and change the world." -James Carroll
------------------------------
Today's Empowering Question
------------------------------
"What do I feel guilty about? Why? Isn't it about time I let it go?"
------------------------------
Today's Fast Session
------------------------------
Whew! There are a lot of things to feel guilty about aren't there?
We could feel bad about our thoughts, our mistakes, our failures. We didn't try hard enough. We didn't make a decision soon enough and lost out on something we wanted. We invested too heavily in one company, and its stock bombed.
Something we said or did deeply hurt another person. We told an off-color joke. We were responsible to hundreds or even thousands of others and somehow, we let them down. It's endless.
And we die a thousand deaths over it.
It's true that our thoughts, words and actions can have negative consequences.
Fortunately, it's these consequences, thought out beforehand, that keep us from doing many things that WOULD hurt others as well as ourselves.
But we can't foresee EVERY bad result coming down the pike. To err is human, as they say.
Knowing that, though, doesn't always (and for some people, it never does) make it feel any better when we make a blunder. Soooo, we get the guilt... which can be very useful.
But it's when we get overrun with guilt that we just get paralyzed, unable to forgive ourselves for this "heinous" act we performed.
As James Carroll said, St. Peter was able to forgive himself for denying Jesus and move on to take actions that changed the course of the world in a positive way. If he had forever thought himself horrible and unable to make amends, our world could be very different today.
We're all exactly the same as Peter.
So many people make a mistake or say something in a fit of rage, and forever after define themselves by it.
We say that we ARE stupid, or we ARE a bad person, a lazy person, a selfish person. Guilt literally can put us
behind bars in the sense that it takes away our freedom to choose our future actions.
We too often don't want to risk these mistakes again, so we stay quiet. We don't voice our ideas, in case they wouldn't work out... Because if they didn't work, not only would we feel stupid, but we would feel overly responsible for the consequences.
Yes, guilt and shame can be a vicious circle that can literally shackle our potential.
But because it's invisible, we usually don't see it. We just think we're being wise... that we're protecting
ourselves.
Have you ever wondered how people who are in the spotlight or who have been successful in business deal with their impactful decisions that turn out badly?
Well, the trouble with being well known is that your mistakes and blunders are also well known.
So how do these people treat their gaffs?
They put them in a perspective that minimizes them. And as long as this perspective allows them to learn to not repeat the same mistakes over and over, they can go on and continue to be a top performer in their field... which can benefit themselves and others.
What would happen if a popular actress had a movie flop and decided she was the cause? She may never want to risk that kind of failure again. She may start making incredibly bad career decisions... decisions that could potentially affect the flow of hundreds of millions of dollars.
If you are responsible for someone else's tremendous pain or bad situation, how do you go on and achieve a high degree of success, happiness or wealth without feeling guilty?
You don't. Feel the guilt. And learn from it.
But when you've learned what you need, give the guilt a shape, pop it in a jar, seal it up and throw it away.
Forgive yourself.
All our products are filled with statements about letting go of guilt and past hurts because unless you do, there is no risking, no effort, no accomplishment...
...And in the event that you do accomplish much, without self-forgiveness there is little joy in what you've done. You just feel guilty about it.
There are too many good books on the subject for me to steer you toward any one in particular, but do some study on it. Learn about how guilt is affecting you...
...Because you can be certain of one thing. Guilt is negatively affecting your daily decisions to some degree.
And the extent to which you can lessen it is the exact measure of additional accomplishment and joy you will have in your life.
Many people will NEVER forgive you for your actions. That's why YOU have to.
Right now, think of something great that you experienced in the last ten years that you had absolutely no concept of before you experienced it. Remember what it was like during the experience? Stunning. Exhilarating. You were awe struck.
Well, when you can let go of the things you've done and move on with a clean slate, you will feel something that is possibly ten times greater than what you experienced back then.
It's all about "how much you made when you were right" & "how little you lost when you were wrong"
-
winston - Billionaire Boss
- Posts: 119682
- Joined: Wed May 07, 2008 9:28 am
Re: Success University (Nov 08 - Jan 09)
by winston » Thu Jan 29, 2009 9:22 pm
Worth Quoting: Anthony Robbins on Commitment
"I believe life is constantly testing us for our level of commitment, and life's greatest rewards are reserved for those who demonstrate a never-ending commitment to act until they achieve.
This level of resolve can move mountains, but it must be constant and consistent. As simplistic as this may sound, it is still the common denominator separating those who live their dreams from those who live in regret."
"I believe life is constantly testing us for our level of commitment, and life's greatest rewards are reserved for those who demonstrate a never-ending commitment to act until they achieve.
This level of resolve can move mountains, but it must be constant and consistent. As simplistic as this may sound, it is still the common denominator separating those who live their dreams from those who live in regret."
It's all about "how much you made when you were right" & "how little you lost when you were wrong"
-
winston - Billionaire Boss
- Posts: 119682
- Joined: Wed May 07, 2008 9:28 am
Re: Success University (Nov 08 - Jan 09)
by sidney » Thu Jan 29, 2009 11:56 pm
Embedded videos have been disabled.
Click to view video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D1R-jKKp3NA
Story about steve jobs. His life and wholesome good advice. If i have his half maturity, i will already go far in life.
Click to view video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D1R-jKKp3NA
Story about steve jobs. His life and wholesome good advice. If i have his half maturity, i will already go far in life.
Tempered.
-
sidney - Foreman
- Posts: 484
- Joined: Wed May 07, 2008 10:24 pm
Re: Success University (Nov 08 - Jan 09)
by winston » Fri Jan 30, 2009 12:49 pm
Your conclusion that there isn't enough of something—whether it is enough land, or money, or clarity—stems from you learning, without meaning to, a vibration that holds you apart from what you want. There is no limitation.
If you identify a desire for it, Source recognizes your desire, and immediately begins to deliver it to you. And it will manifest in the variety, in the fullness, and in the way that you, and only you, learn to allow it.
Excerpted from a workshop in San Francisco, CA on Saturday, March 8th, 2003
All Is Well
If you identify a desire for it, Source recognizes your desire, and immediately begins to deliver it to you. And it will manifest in the variety, in the fullness, and in the way that you, and only you, learn to allow it.
Excerpted from a workshop in San Francisco, CA on Saturday, March 8th, 2003
All Is Well
It's all about "how much you made when you were right" & "how little you lost when you were wrong"
-
winston - Billionaire Boss
- Posts: 119682
- Joined: Wed May 07, 2008 9:28 am
Re: Success University (Nov 08 - Jan 09)
by winston » Sat Jan 31, 2009 8:48 am
School Is Never Out by Mike Brescia
------------------------------
Today's Empowering Quote
------------------------------
"Phil Jackson knows how to coach me. He gets me angry. When I get angry, I dominate. It's perfect." -Shaquille O'Neal
------------------------------
Today's Empowering Question
------------------------------
"Who else can I learn important skills and lessons from now?"
------------------------------
Today's Fast Session
------------------------------
In today's quote, Shaquille O'Neal, the All-Star center with the Los Angeles Lakers, underscores an incredibly
important point. And that is this...
No matter what your individual accomplishments are, no matter how good you think you are at something, you can still get better. Sometimes a LOT better.
Shaq was already named as one of the 50 greatest players of all time.
When he wants a basket or a rebound, he won't be denied.
But the problem is that while he has always had the physical skills to be great, his decisions haven't always
been the greatest.
One problem was, his mind was often somewhere else besides the game. When that happens, he might get his points but his team would lose... even though he may have scored 40 or 50.
Another one is, for years he was basically a one-man show. His teammates were not made better because Shaq was playing. Result? Seven years... no championships.
What the addition of Phil Jackson as coach has meant, besides back-to-back championships, is Shaq now plays a more team oriented game... the kind that makes everyone better. He now has his head in the game more. He's less selfish. He's a better listener... more teachable.
Because no matter how good you are at some task or profession, you can't possibly push yourself or motivate
yourself as well as a coach or teacher can do it for you.
It's interesting that Shaq made this statement, because recently he was extremely angry at Phil for pushing him too hard.
But he's to be admired, because he again realized that championships are the goal.
It's often hard to take orders from people, especially when you don't agree with them.
But keep in mind that it's almost unheard of to self-teach your way to excellence through high school, college or a business career. Guidance is the most valuable thing about institutions of learning and business. Deadlines are usually better enforced by someone other than ourselves.
Willpower, quite often, is anything but powerful.
This is why self-help info products and gadgets don't usually produce the change in people that they want. An exercise bike can't force you to get on it. You have to do that by yourself.
When I talk about seeing each day as a day to learn, much of that learning must come from simple observation.
Watch people.
Listen to those who get a lot done. Listen to their words. Ask about what motivates them. Ask them about how they get over their problems and how they 'use' them to carry on.
Yes. I said USE their problems.
Most people have challenges and they are seen as problems, excuses, valid reasons to fail.
Effective people see them as motivation.
How?
By realizing that EVERYONE has challenges.
Just because you have some tragedy doesn't mean you're cursed. It means you have to get over it. It means that when you do get over it, you will go on with valuable experience that will help you in the future.
You have been given another mental tool.
If you see challenges and tragedies as legitimate excuses to hide, to quit, to fail...
...then you don't get the valuable experience. You will be less, not more, in the future.
You'll be less able to handle it again, when life hands you another big challenge... and another.
And life will. You can count on it.
So don't beg for life to be different than this. Because it won't change.
And that's good.
See this as one of the great mysteries unveiled for you and you'll be richer and happier by multiples.
See it as unwelcome news and you'll continue to hide, to quit, to fail.
------------------------------
Today's Empowering Quote
------------------------------
"Phil Jackson knows how to coach me. He gets me angry. When I get angry, I dominate. It's perfect." -Shaquille O'Neal
------------------------------
Today's Empowering Question
------------------------------
"Who else can I learn important skills and lessons from now?"
------------------------------
Today's Fast Session
------------------------------
In today's quote, Shaquille O'Neal, the All-Star center with the Los Angeles Lakers, underscores an incredibly
important point. And that is this...
No matter what your individual accomplishments are, no matter how good you think you are at something, you can still get better. Sometimes a LOT better.
Shaq was already named as one of the 50 greatest players of all time.
When he wants a basket or a rebound, he won't be denied.
But the problem is that while he has always had the physical skills to be great, his decisions haven't always
been the greatest.
One problem was, his mind was often somewhere else besides the game. When that happens, he might get his points but his team would lose... even though he may have scored 40 or 50.
Another one is, for years he was basically a one-man show. His teammates were not made better because Shaq was playing. Result? Seven years... no championships.
What the addition of Phil Jackson as coach has meant, besides back-to-back championships, is Shaq now plays a more team oriented game... the kind that makes everyone better. He now has his head in the game more. He's less selfish. He's a better listener... more teachable.
Because no matter how good you are at some task or profession, you can't possibly push yourself or motivate
yourself as well as a coach or teacher can do it for you.
It's interesting that Shaq made this statement, because recently he was extremely angry at Phil for pushing him too hard.
But he's to be admired, because he again realized that championships are the goal.
It's often hard to take orders from people, especially when you don't agree with them.
But keep in mind that it's almost unheard of to self-teach your way to excellence through high school, college or a business career. Guidance is the most valuable thing about institutions of learning and business. Deadlines are usually better enforced by someone other than ourselves.
Willpower, quite often, is anything but powerful.
This is why self-help info products and gadgets don't usually produce the change in people that they want. An exercise bike can't force you to get on it. You have to do that by yourself.
When I talk about seeing each day as a day to learn, much of that learning must come from simple observation.
Watch people.
Listen to those who get a lot done. Listen to their words. Ask about what motivates them. Ask them about how they get over their problems and how they 'use' them to carry on.
Yes. I said USE their problems.
Most people have challenges and they are seen as problems, excuses, valid reasons to fail.
Effective people see them as motivation.
How?
By realizing that EVERYONE has challenges.
Just because you have some tragedy doesn't mean you're cursed. It means you have to get over it. It means that when you do get over it, you will go on with valuable experience that will help you in the future.
You have been given another mental tool.
If you see challenges and tragedies as legitimate excuses to hide, to quit, to fail...
...then you don't get the valuable experience. You will be less, not more, in the future.
You'll be less able to handle it again, when life hands you another big challenge... and another.
And life will. You can count on it.
So don't beg for life to be different than this. Because it won't change.
And that's good.
See this as one of the great mysteries unveiled for you and you'll be richer and happier by multiples.
See it as unwelcome news and you'll continue to hide, to quit, to fail.
It's all about "how much you made when you were right" & "how little you lost when you were wrong"
-
winston - Billionaire Boss
- Posts: 119682
- Joined: Wed May 07, 2008 9:28 am
Re: Success University (Nov 08 - Jan 09)
by winston » Sat Jan 31, 2009 9:03 am
Could You Being Living With More Courage! by Margie Warrell
Finish this sentence – If I had the guts I would…
What would you do? What issues that you’ve been silently brewing on would you speak up about? What changes would you make in your career, your relationships… your life? What goals would you take on and what commitments would you break off? Ahhh… if only you had the guts.
Of course it’s much more convenient to blame your woes or lack of opportunity on your spouse, your boss, genetics, the economy, your kids or ‘all the above’ but the truth is that you are alone are responsible for the shape of your life and the state of your heart. Yes, that’s right – you alone are responsible! Sure sometimes life throws curve balls your way but whist you can’t always choose your experiences in life, you always get to decide your experience of life.
Sadly though too many people allow fear and doubt to determine their path and choose the certainty of mediocrity because they are so bloody terrified of the possibility of messing up or looking foolish. In ‘settling’, they sell out on their potential, on their dreams and on themselves.
Eleanor Roosevelt once said, “Most people tip toe through life only to make it safely to deathâ€. So what about you – where are you tip toeing? More to the point, what would you do if you weren’t afraid of speaking up, of messing up or of what people might say? Whether at home, work or beyond, your life is waiting for you to reclaim the power that your doubts and fears have been wielding and begin living it more purposefully, more passionately and more courageously.
Perhaps as you’re reading this you’re thinking, “But I’m different. Really. I’ve always been timid and never had the boldness and gutsiness that others do.†Well, I hate to burst your bubble but that’s just not the truth. Rather, it’s just a story you’ve become very attached to that lets you off the hook in taking ownership for all those things in your life that aren’t as you’d like them to be. Sure you may never have performed some extraordinary feat of bravery, survived some dreadful tragedy or overcome a life threatening illness but that doesn’t mean you don’t have all the courage you need to do whatever it is that tugs at your heart strings.
You just haven’t been forced to draw on your courage for your survival. The fact is if you found yourself in similar circumstances you would realize that you too possessed more strength and courage than you ever imagined. The problem is that most we human beings go through life never realizing just how resourceful, how strong, how capable and how courageous we have it within ourselves to be.
Ultimately courage is not the absence of fear, self doubt, misgivings or uncertainty. Not at all! Courage is action in their presence; its feeling your fear and taking action anyway! Of course if it were easy to live with courage everyone would be doing it. The reality is, living the courage is likely the biggest challenge you will ever face. It’s also the most important, because when you tap into the courage that resides within you it opens up a whole new world of possibility.
Whilst no-one is born with a genetic bypass to fear, everyone is born with a heart and the ability to connect with what stirs it. By doing so everyone (and yes, that includes you) is able to tap into the reserves of spirit (from which the word inspire derives) to face their challenges with courage, to dream bigger, to live bolder.
As risky as it may feel to you to begin making changes and taking chances, the far greater risk is to take no risk at all.
Choosing to stay in the safe, predictable, familiar confines of your comfort zone will take you down a path that will one day have you looking back on your life and wondering regretfully “What if?†As ordinary as you may think you are there are things that you, and only you, can ever do. So fear regret more than you do failure and don’t wait for “some day†to arrive when the moon and stars all line up and all your doubts have disappeared to step out boldly out into your life. Life is too short for such a long endless wait. Rather make the decision to embrace a renewed sense of adventure in the life you have right now and to begin fulfilling the only true mission you ever really have in your life – to do the best you can with what you have been given.
make changes to those aspects of your life that aren’t as you’d like them to be, to speak up about issues that concern you, or try to accomplish something you’ve never sought to do before, the
Everyday opportunities arise for you to live with greater courage. Whenever you make the choice to express yourself more openly; to give up well worn excuses and dare to pursue something bigger; to open your heart and reveal your humanity more fully; to get up after a fall; to say no to something that doesn’t inspire you and yes to something that does; to step up to the plate of leadership in your workplace, in your family, in your life, you are being more courageous and expanding your ability to live a more meaningful, rewarding, successful and joyful life.
Never again do you need to say “If I just had the guts†because you do! All the courage you need is available to you right now. It’s just waiting on you to tap into your heart, to connect with whatever makes your spirit come alive, and to step boldly forward in living the life you aspire to live and being the extra-ordinary person you have it within you to become. Don’t let your life pass you by as you tip toe through it only to make it safely to death. Move out onto center stage, ask for more from life, dream bigger dreams for yourself and trust that wherever your dreams may take you, you have the courage to travel.
Don’t believe me? Your life is waiting on you to dare to try.
Finish this sentence – If I had the guts I would…
What would you do? What issues that you’ve been silently brewing on would you speak up about? What changes would you make in your career, your relationships… your life? What goals would you take on and what commitments would you break off? Ahhh… if only you had the guts.
Of course it’s much more convenient to blame your woes or lack of opportunity on your spouse, your boss, genetics, the economy, your kids or ‘all the above’ but the truth is that you are alone are responsible for the shape of your life and the state of your heart. Yes, that’s right – you alone are responsible! Sure sometimes life throws curve balls your way but whist you can’t always choose your experiences in life, you always get to decide your experience of life.
Sadly though too many people allow fear and doubt to determine their path and choose the certainty of mediocrity because they are so bloody terrified of the possibility of messing up or looking foolish. In ‘settling’, they sell out on their potential, on their dreams and on themselves.
Eleanor Roosevelt once said, “Most people tip toe through life only to make it safely to deathâ€. So what about you – where are you tip toeing? More to the point, what would you do if you weren’t afraid of speaking up, of messing up or of what people might say? Whether at home, work or beyond, your life is waiting for you to reclaim the power that your doubts and fears have been wielding and begin living it more purposefully, more passionately and more courageously.
Perhaps as you’re reading this you’re thinking, “But I’m different. Really. I’ve always been timid and never had the boldness and gutsiness that others do.†Well, I hate to burst your bubble but that’s just not the truth. Rather, it’s just a story you’ve become very attached to that lets you off the hook in taking ownership for all those things in your life that aren’t as you’d like them to be. Sure you may never have performed some extraordinary feat of bravery, survived some dreadful tragedy or overcome a life threatening illness but that doesn’t mean you don’t have all the courage you need to do whatever it is that tugs at your heart strings.
You just haven’t been forced to draw on your courage for your survival. The fact is if you found yourself in similar circumstances you would realize that you too possessed more strength and courage than you ever imagined. The problem is that most we human beings go through life never realizing just how resourceful, how strong, how capable and how courageous we have it within ourselves to be.
Ultimately courage is not the absence of fear, self doubt, misgivings or uncertainty. Not at all! Courage is action in their presence; its feeling your fear and taking action anyway! Of course if it were easy to live with courage everyone would be doing it. The reality is, living the courage is likely the biggest challenge you will ever face. It’s also the most important, because when you tap into the courage that resides within you it opens up a whole new world of possibility.
Whilst no-one is born with a genetic bypass to fear, everyone is born with a heart and the ability to connect with what stirs it. By doing so everyone (and yes, that includes you) is able to tap into the reserves of spirit (from which the word inspire derives) to face their challenges with courage, to dream bigger, to live bolder.
As risky as it may feel to you to begin making changes and taking chances, the far greater risk is to take no risk at all.
Choosing to stay in the safe, predictable, familiar confines of your comfort zone will take you down a path that will one day have you looking back on your life and wondering regretfully “What if?†As ordinary as you may think you are there are things that you, and only you, can ever do. So fear regret more than you do failure and don’t wait for “some day†to arrive when the moon and stars all line up and all your doubts have disappeared to step out boldly out into your life. Life is too short for such a long endless wait. Rather make the decision to embrace a renewed sense of adventure in the life you have right now and to begin fulfilling the only true mission you ever really have in your life – to do the best you can with what you have been given.
make changes to those aspects of your life that aren’t as you’d like them to be, to speak up about issues that concern you, or try to accomplish something you’ve never sought to do before, the
Everyday opportunities arise for you to live with greater courage. Whenever you make the choice to express yourself more openly; to give up well worn excuses and dare to pursue something bigger; to open your heart and reveal your humanity more fully; to get up after a fall; to say no to something that doesn’t inspire you and yes to something that does; to step up to the plate of leadership in your workplace, in your family, in your life, you are being more courageous and expanding your ability to live a more meaningful, rewarding, successful and joyful life.
Never again do you need to say “If I just had the guts†because you do! All the courage you need is available to you right now. It’s just waiting on you to tap into your heart, to connect with whatever makes your spirit come alive, and to step boldly forward in living the life you aspire to live and being the extra-ordinary person you have it within you to become. Don’t let your life pass you by as you tip toe through it only to make it safely to death. Move out onto center stage, ask for more from life, dream bigger dreams for yourself and trust that wherever your dreams may take you, you have the courage to travel.
Don’t believe me? Your life is waiting on you to dare to try.
It's all about "how much you made when you were right" & "how little you lost when you were wrong"
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winston - Billionaire Boss
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